1/25/22

I had an interesting, somewhat enlightening, and moving experience at work the other day.

It began when I was rooming a patient during a busy day. And it came up that they happened to be a Vietnam vet. They mentioned that they were 19 when they went overseas and that they regretted what happened to the Vietnamese people because they didn't deserve it and we should have never been there in the first place. And we talked a little bit more about that and some other things, like how he was worried we'd get into a conflict in Ukraine and at least Trump hadn't started another war and other things that veered more along conservative lines of thought that I tend to strongly disagree with.

At the time, I thought 'oh boy, one of them.' But I remained as neutral and empathetic as I could as I finished all of my rooming duties and got them ready for the doctor. After the doctor saw the patient, they told me that the patient said they thought "that young kid" was really kind, which gave everyone a laugh because I'm definitely not a young anything anymore. I also learned that they have a brain tumor that's essentially terminal and they likely have less than a year to live. And it made me extremely sad but also happy that I didn't allow myself to show how I felt about some of the things they said and was still able to be caring and empathetic and helpful.

It makes me wish that I could always be that way instead of letting my emotions get the better of me and act without thinking about the totality of someone's life and how I have no idea what they are going through. It's so easy to react in the moment and judge people by that singular context even if we intentionally try to see beyond them, and doubly so when we're placed in positions of stress and limited time. We are so ingrained to be quick and efficient and get through whatever task as fast as possible that we have less patience and empathy for others we meet, seeing only the task or the superficialities that bother us and not the person underneath.

As with most people, I've had these kinds of experiences and little insights before, but it's easy to forget those lessons over time. And it's nice to have moments like this as a reminder to continue to make an effort to see deeper and react less, especially when I'm stretched thin and at my most snarky and cynical. Because everybody at least deserves to have their humanity recognized, if just for one fleeting moment.